Having Fun in Sobriety and Making Friendships

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Fun in sobriety:

Finding enjoyable and safe activities for sobriety can be challenging. Many times, use of alcohol or other substances can be associated with several activities, like having a summer barbecue. These events can catch those in recovery off guard, making it challenging to find activities that are fun, but also safe for sobriety.

While alcohol or drugs can find their way into any event, the activities below can be helpful in having fun while being sober:

  • Take walks with a friend or by yourself
  • Join a gym and take an exercise class
  • Volunteer for an organization that means something to you
  • Become a sponsor and help someone in their recovery
  • Take a class in-person or online – it’s always great to learn something new
  • Take a walking tour of your city – you never know what you will find
  • Listen to podcasts on recovery or a topic that fascinates you
  • Plant a garden
  • Throw a sober backyard party for close friends – sometimes others find it relieving not to be pressured to drink to have fun
  • Attend a play or local performance
  • Learn to cook a new meal and share it with others
  • Try biking, hiking, or spending more time outdoors
  • Try a yoga class with a friend
  • Spend time near water – paddle boarding, kayaking, canoeing
  • Start a new book

Where to make friends:

Like having fun in sobriety, making new friendships that are safe for recovery can be a challenge. Often individuals in recovery must distance themselves from certain relationships to achieve their goals. In response, it’s common for individuals in recovery to experience loneliness and/or disconnection from others.

Below are several tips that can be helpful in building friendships while in recovery:

  • Engage in a support group like AA, NA, SOS, or SMART Recovery
  • Join an interest club like a kayaking club
  • Take a class in person – you might meet someone with similar interests
  • Volunteer for an organization
  • Go to the gym, YMCA, or take a fitness class
  • Join a travel club or group

How to make friends:

Building friendships can be difficult. Most friendships require good communication and mutually shared interests or goals in life. These tips can help kick start a new friendship:

  • Engage and listen – balancing listening with speaking can help set a strong foundation for any friendship
  • Be attentive – try to give someone your undivided attention and avoid distracting thoughts or things in your environment
  • Have good eye contact – eye contact can be uncomfortable, but communicates self-confidence
  • Stop negative thoughts – its easy to worry about what someone thinks of you or that you’re not doing well in the conversation. These thoughts can undermine your ability to form friendships. Try imagining a stop sign when these thoughts come up during conversations.
  • Find common ground – Mutually shared interests, hobbies, or goals can help set a solid foundation for friendship.
  • Keep it light – avoid discussing possibly controversial topics, like politics. These can lead to disagreements or even arguments
  • Ask questions – Asking a question about someone communicates interest in their lives.
  • Try to establish a follow–up meeting: instead of saying “we should hang out sometime” try being specific with plans as this helps a relationship continue. Try saying something like, “I was thinking of checking out this art show on Friday, would you like to come?”

Disclaimer: All content on this website is for informational purposes only. It does not substitute for clinical treatment or advice. If you, a friend, or a family member is struggling with mental health and/or addiction issues please call our main office at 952-926-2526. For emergencies, go to your nearest emergency room and/or dial 911.